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Dating Rules For Women - Why You Shouldn’t Ask HIM Out?

Let me rush to my answer: No! Never make the first move for a first date. Sure, most dating rules for women have their exceptions. But I’m going explain why you shouldn’t ever consider breaking this one.


More importantly... I’ll reveal something that you SHOULD do (something far more effective)—that influences men to ask YOU out.

Why It Matters

If you do the asking, the overwhelming majority of men will perceive you as desperate, easy, and only looking for casual sex or a quick wedding. Once he’s mentally categorized you that way, it’s nearly impossible to change it. His perception becomes his reality.

This dating rule for women is all about ensuring that you don’t sabotage your desire for a quality relationship with someone who takes you seriously.

Dating Rules For Women . Why He Must Initiate

When it comes to romance, men are socially (and perhaps biologically) conditioned to act as "initiators.” Fair or not, our culture’s norms are:

MEN ask women for phone numbers.

MEN ask women for a date. 

MEN ask women for exclusivity.

MEN ask women for marriage.

Why He Stays—or Goes?

Doing those actions is how he “grades” himself against his own inner checklist. Asking YOU out is a powerful way for him to feel masculine —i.e. responsible and correct. So if you reverse that dynamic (by you doing the asking) it psychologically throws men off balance.

Unfortunately, when men feel off balance, they tend to flee from whatever—or whoever—triggered that feeling. Not the outcome you wanted, right?

Dating Rules For Women - If He’s Shy...

What if the guy is so timid or afraid of rejection that he can’t ever get himself to ask you out (even though he’s interested)? To him, it’s never the “right time.”

In those rare cases, shouldn’t YOU just ask him?

Not, unless you want to forfeit all the benefits of this key dating rule for women.

Though he may be a nice guy, he has proven that he’s unwilling or unable to override his fears to take necessary actions. Start out by doing that FOR him and you’ll probably have to keep doing all the “heavy lifting” in the relationship.

Use Your ‘Influence-ability’

There’s huge difference between asking a man out and influencing him to ask you. Try this simple, highly-effective influence strategy.

Faithfully apply this dating rule for women and expect the number of interested men approaching you to sharply increase.

Your Goal:

To create brief, non-flirtatious, “interaction opportunities” with men in social settings.

Your Mindset:

In settings where there are men, (the kind that you’d like to ask you out) go in fully imagining yourself as the gracious, hospitable “host” of the event/activity. Mentally recast the men as your invited guests (NOT potential online dates)—like at a party in your home.

“Influence-ability” in Action

Action steps to follow this dating rule for women:

  1. Cross the room to within a distance of 2-3 feet of him.
  2. Smile warmly, extend your hand, and with a generically friendly (NOT flirtatious) tone…
  3. Say: “Hi, I’m (your first name).  Good to see you,...tell me your name?” (Pausing as he shares his name).
  4. Then, lightly touch his elbow (for only one second) as you confirm his name, saying: “Alan, you said?  Ok, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Alan.” (Polite, sincerity).
  5. Pause momentarily, before turning away (giving him space to initiate conversation if he chooses), then…
  6. Finish by lightly touching his elbow for one second as you say: “Good to talking you, Alan. I’ll see you later!
  7. ImportantImmediately, move on to greet another person (male or female) in close distance to “Alan”—(within less than 30 seconds)

The Built-in BENEFITS:

Using your “influence-ability” is essential to smart dating. It’s a rule for women that will make you far more noticeable to men, and perceived as a friendly, and self-confident woman—NOT a desperate one.

Following this dating tip for women, gives men a quick, comfortable way to take in your visuals and briefly sample your open, accessible personality. That’s just the “proof” a man is looking for to motivate himself to approach you with confidence.

You will have empowered him to initiate the next step: whether it’s a follow-up conversation, a request for your contact info formally ask you out for a date.


mycupid · 216 days ago
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19.11.2020 (216 days ago)
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Dating Rules For Women - Why You Shouldn’t Ask HIM Out?